You’re a Dummy! How Automakers Treat Us Like Idiots
If you’re driving a non-European car built since the early 1980’s, then congratulations, because you’re a dummy! Well, at least the automakers think you are. Sad, but true – just think of all the stupid lights on instrument panels (IP) in new cars. Cars didn’t always come with reminders that the handbrake was on, or that the oil needed to be changed, or that there’s no oil at all. Now, there are lights on the dash to indicate that the headlights are on, and warnings that one of the tires is flat. Unless the driver is blind, deaf, and mute, shouldn’t these things be obvious?
The idiotization of the IP is an extremely dangerous trend. Calibrated gauges have given way to dummy gauges, and some gauges have been flat out replaced with warning lights. A color coding system was developed to let drivers know the urgency level of the warning. Blue and green symbols are usually informational, yellow meant to get it checked soon, and red meant pull over right now. However, the color coded system was lost in translation, and not many drivers recognize what all those symbols and their colors mean. This confusion led to drivers completely ignoring the warnings – which can become costly.
The most prominent example today is the coolant temperature gauge, which is included on most cars. However, the gauges have no numbers on them. That’s because these gauges completely ignore what the actual coolant temperature is. I’ve plugged into the computers of many modern cars and found that most coolant temp gauges will read rock-steady “normal” when the coolant is anywhere between 140F and 220F. For reference, most vehicles run in the 180-190F range and 212F is boiling water – that’s bad! These gauges do not budge from normal until after 220F. By that time, the driver only has mere minutes to recognize the problem and find a safe place to pull over before potential engine damage takes place.
BMW now relies on essays in hopes that you will pull over to read them, saving your engine in the process
Another example that many people don’t know about is the oil pressure gauge. This gauge was prominent in cars at one point, but has since gone away completely. It’s unfathomable why this gauge went away – a good oil pressure gauge can reveal when an oil change is needed, or point to why a vehicle is running poorly. In fact, oil pressure has become even more important in recent years with the advent of variable valve technology – yet the gauge is nowhere to be found. The idiot light that replaced it is even worse – it doesn’t turn on until the engine is dangerously low on oil. A friend has a 2004 Honda Pilot which allowed 70% of its oil to disappear before turning on the oil pressure light. With my 2004 Mazda6, some owners of similar vehicles faced a $6000 engine replacement because the oil light never turned on before the engine ate all its oil and fried itself.
Gauges like this one used to be a common fixture in cars - before it became necessary to read essays while driving.
If there is one bright spot in all this, it’s that European cars are holding out on idiotizing their IP’s. That’s not to say that all European cars provide a full suite of gauges. The 2006-2012 BMW 3-series doesn’t even include a coolant temperature gauge. However, the gauges in European cars are usually marked with numbers on them, and they do move. I see this first hand on my mom’s 2000 Mercedes M-class – the coolant temperature gauge bounces around between 80-95C in city driving, as it should.
Thus, drivers of European vehicles can rejoice that they can better prevent engine meltdown – but only if they pay attention to their gauges. For the rest of us, due diligence will be necessary. If being stranded and massive repair bills don’t sound appetizing, a few small steps can prevent such a terrible experience. Make sure that vehicle maintenance is up to date. Check the oil once a week, the tire pressure and tread condition once a month. Keep an eye on the gauges when the vehicle is under stress – going over the Grapevine, for example – and check the rearview mirrors for a trail of smoke. Remember, simple steps can go a long way towards saving your engine from certain death.